Saturday, May 30, 2015

Work-Life Imbalance


Balancing in 10 steps: Living life and leaving work

the work wall adjacent to my desk at acorn training

This Saturday, I'm stuck at home nursing an annoying cold that refuses to go away. Deadlines at work are creeping up on me but I seriously can't think straight with all this fog clouding my judgement. So I've decided to edit a draft blog post that I did long ago, which has become relevant again since I've gone back to work.

One thing's for sure - I love my job. I loved my work as a teacher in the past. But I also love my current job no less. Some people tell me it's because I'm lucky or that it's only because of my overly optimistic personality, perhaps, but I've also been very careful about maintaining a clear line between work and life. That's what I wanted to share in this post -

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Fatherhood Favouritism

gif designed by cherie lim for humblet

Fortunately for me, I'm a daughter and I have a father myself.

Unfortunately though, I'm having a daughter and J.G. is driving me nuts whispering to humblet everyday as if she hear him at that volume. . .even as I type, he's soaked through in perspiration fixing up the drawers for her nursery with random shouts of 'humblet, this is all for you!' What a nut.

The Post-Mortem

After the drawers were finished, the parents of humblet sat down for a quiet night snack.
Here are some of my thoughts after this post yesterday -

1. Fathers do not exasperate your children

These wise words are definitely based on tonnes of evidence built up over thousands of years. It's the dad who will annoy their kids by poking them, tossing them about, wrestle them when their about to sleep (only to incur the wrath of the already exhausted mother).

I watched a three-year old shove his dad away from his play area because dad's idea of basketball was to hold the ball out of reach from his barely 4-foot tall son, then dunk it spectacularly over his head. How fun.

2. Husbands love your wives

Another wise phrase that may seem hugely irrelevant to newly married couples, but one that strikes you as children come along the way. One may assume its only natural that a man loves his wife, but this love could turn into duty / responsibility / compatibility if a couple were not careful.

Mothers I believe are just as susceptible. You spend all day with your kid, and some even spend all night next to their child. Where's the husband in the picture. Statistics tell us that a child who has loving parents generally grows up much more secure, confident and commitment to his / her own family. Thus it seems there's more truth to the above statement than a host of jealous wives.

And so we remind each other daily that we are married to one another, not to our children.

3. It takes a village to raise a child

Watching a dear same-age friend raise three young children, I can not help but raise both hands in agreement to this age-old cliche. Good parenting begins and ends in community.

She never hesitates to discipline her child even when we are around. Neither do we cringe or get embarrassed by it, instead we stand by her and encourage her children toward the same behavior. We try our best as uncles and aunties to use the same parenting metalanguage as she does, so her children understand these are important.

If you want your children to be socially adept, consider your own friends and relatives. They will be next most influential people in your child's formative life after you.


Monday, May 25, 2015

Are you ready to be a mother?

a friend's precious baby boy at 10 days old

Now that the baby bump has become more of a baby mountain, people have been showing a lot more concern about my well being and humblet's growth. Just yesterday, my bladder was about to explode, so I half skipped / jogged to the toilet. Just within that fifty meter distance, there were endless voices of strained concerned, 'don't run!' 'be careful, you're pregnant!' and the like.

Most of all, I'm hearing this question a lot (and I mean it when I say A LOT) - 'Are you ready to be a mother?'

Here are my thoughts -

Saturday, May 23, 2015


a cute blue car
photo credits: jn

Those (car)efree days

Gratitude this week comes in the form of four wheels, air-con comfort together with a personal chauffeur. We got a CAR!

We certainly didn't buy one, I stand by all that I said in this post. We certainly cannot and will not choose to spend on such a luxury. However, we are tip-toeing into the Third Trimester now and there's a lot that needs to be done. Shelving, furniture and all the other nitty gritty of preparing even a simple nursery. Many kind mums have been encouraging me to quickly resolve these things before I hit week 32 and I'll be so big it'll be tiring to even walk, but it would be hard to do these without transport.

Our fears were premature. As in the week past, we've had three offers from family and friends to loan us their own cars. One even went to the extent of volunteering to ferry us to and from our errands. Without us even saying a word, people have been thinking of ways to help us and for their thoughts alone we are extremely grateful.

So here we are, on the brink of the final lap in this pregnancy marathon. Armed with a car to collect all these wonderful second-hand baby love that others have offered. And once again, I am left humbled and grateful.

Hope you are all having a restful Saturday with all this rain~


Monday, May 18, 2015

In conversation with a young trainee teacher

Two weeks ago I found myself in deep conversation with a young trainee teacher. I accidentally let it slip that I had been a teacher in the past and suddenly she had heaps of questions to ask. To be honest, I'm always afraid of giving young teachers advice. I'm afraid of being too cynical or too realistic for their ideals.

While she walked away grateful, I walked away thinking I need to think this through more thoroughly lest it happens again. Here are some of her questions and my responses (including after thoughts) -

Saturday, May 16, 2015

Finding Mr Right and all the other wrong BGR clichés

better together
a candid still from our wedding day

This is part II for those who are wondering. Part one was a short rant before I appeared as a guest on a BGR forum, which I obviously survived (not without sweaty palms and blushing uncontrollably).
How J.G. speaks so shamelessly confidently about love and relationships is a mystery to me. Friends who were in the audience smirked at my discomfort and obvious desire to bury my head in the ground.

But as I promised, should I survive the forum I would share an honest and open reflection about my own take on BGR. Here are some more annoying cliches and my thoughts on them -

Monday, May 11, 2015

Monday Musings

The Supermum Edition

this woman

People tell me you’ll truly appreciate your mother when you become a mother yourself. But what about those who never become mothers (physically that is) this does not we (they) appreciate our mums any less. If you’d like to read, here’s the story of my amazing mother –

Saturday, May 9, 2015

BGR myths & misconceptions

Marrying your first boyfriend (and other BGR myths & misconceptions)

my favourite photo of us to date

This afternoon J.G. and I are invited to be guests at a BGR Forum. I shudder at the thought.
What if they are expecting nice well-composed married couples who have had equally smooth-sailing and wonderful dating histories. . . I'm probably on the other end of that spectrum.

Also, what if they ask embarrassing questions like when did you have your first kiss?
My personality is completely unsuited for P.D.A (public displays of affection for the unknowing)
because I'm the cynical one who rolls her eyes at couples snuggling together in the train or on the escalator.

Nonetheless, if I survive this forum, I will return to share my experience in another blog post. For now, these are some popular statements I've heard about boy-girl relationships that I have SERIOUS issues with. Have a read an share your thoughts with me -

1. You have to be sure you will marry the person before you date him/her

But if you are SO sure, what's the point of the dating / discovering / learning process? Is that not what dating is for in the first place? So you end up eventually marrying the right dude.

2. Dating and courtship are totally different things

What was that again?

3. Sleeping / living together is cool as long as I end up marrying him/her

Since you're going to get married anyway. . .why not wait till then?

4. The best time to date is when I'm mature enough

Don't kid yourself. Who's ever mature enough?

5. Marry your first love 

Don't even get me started.


As you can see, I'm a terrible source of wise words and dating advice.

But I would love to hear your thoughts and / or if you have any other statements you'd like to me to rip apart. 

Still Grateful,

Monday, May 4, 2015

Motherhood Mondays

My Monday Musing timeslots are fast becoming motherhood Mondays. If time permits, I might do a reflective piece this week. But in view of the ever growing tummy, I finally grit my teeth and did up an inventory.

Here's a preview -

It's a work in progress, but nonetheless it is finally happening.

People who tell me you can totally be prepared for motherhood. . . are NOT mothers. Hence, while I'm not stressing myself out about being fully prepared. I should also not take the highway of laziness.

For those who have been asking me what you can get for baby, let me know if you'd like privy to the above document. I can share it with you and you can decide what to get from the list. 

Either way, I'm grateful to one and all to laugh, cry and burp with humblet and us on this journey.


Saturday, May 2, 2015


How much are you willing to spend on an everyday timepiece?

My husband is a twin and I always find the differences between him and his brother very amusing. For the most part, they look alike, they speak alike and enjoy many similar things in life, be it action movies or basketball. But when it comes to $$$ that's where their 'investments' may differ.

One of them is a Luminox type of guy, branded watches, sunglasses and bags. The other is a more Casio kind of dude, simple, practical and down to earth. I'll leave you to guess who's who.

If you'd like to read my take on timepieces -