Friday, July 20, 2018


"Its because I'm Asian."

That's my go to reason whenever people tell me I'm terrible at expressing my affection. Well that might be true, another reason (excuse) I have is that perhaps I just express my affection very differently from every one else. The people I love get punches, kicks, sarcasm and eye-rolling ALL the time, they know how much I love them. Right?

We are FIVE!

This fifth wedding anniversary, I'm taking a bold leap into the realm of public display of affection. The horrors. Please stop reading here if you like.

There are many reasons why I like J.G. of course, but those are not the same reasons why I love the guy. He's the type of person you'll find very hard not to like, if I may say so myself. Let me put it this way, every kid doing flag day, every fundraiser on street duty, every insurance agent at a booth sees him as a potential target. Kids flock to him on Sundays and his youth love hanging out on any given day. His reputation as Big Friendly Giant is not for nothing.

But those can't be my reasons. You don't marry a person because they constantly spare their loose change for charity or the fact that they are tall enough to swing children off the ground with their outstretched arms. You marry someone because you love them and that's something I plan to do for a long time to come.

So here is my list of I love him because...

1. He keeps me sane

Life can get super crazy at times. A sick kid. A mountain of work and school deadlines. Late night conversations with troubled folk. The dude gets half as much sleep as I do because he has that much more to do and yet, he's the patient one in the mornings. He does the laundry and the cleaning without being asked. He bothers to parent Humblet slowly and intentionally, when I just want to pull my (her) hair out and surrender.

Best part is, he bothers to sit down and explain to Humblet why what she did was wrong and how she should go about correcting her mistake. I would rather just smack her, to me its so much more efficient. But when I hear how he walks her through the events that passed, and prepares her for the punishment she has to bear, I am grateful she has such a loving parent.

2. He provides stability

Refer to wedding illustration footer at the bottom of this blog page.

I'm not just your typical woman. I'm also one who studies, works, writes, teaches and mothers on a daily basis. Takes a pretty ambitious human being to do all that. If J.G. gave me any hints prior to marriage that I'd have to give up all that for him, I think I would have bailed a long time ago.

Instead, each time I take on a new project, he sits right next to me and his company provides that kind of stability to no can give. When I get burned out on those rare moments where all the deadlines hit me at once, he doesn't wag an accusing finger and tell me I only have myself to blame. He quietly makes sure our meals are cooked, our laundry is folded and our daughter has a play mate.

3. He is spontaneous

 I don't know what kind of network he subscribes too, but he always seems to know. It has happened so many times I am no longer surprised, but no less pleased. He comes home and without me uttering a word, he just picks waves me out of the kitchen and declares we are having dinner out today. How does he know I had a crappy day and cooking was the last thing on my mind?

Or how does he know I'm about to burn myself out when I'm not even conscious of it? Stop work now, we have to go to the beach! Take leave on these dates, we have to go on holiday. Forget about the chores this morning, let's go for a long cycle. Don't bother cooking, let's have a meal out tonight!

Happy Groom in Jersey for gatecrash

Most importantly, we are still in love because we choose to be each and every day. Not because we are married and not because we have to, but because we want to.

Here are the other posts in the wedding series if you'd like to read more -
The Meaning of Marriage
How to Quarrel with your Spouse
The Struggles of Marriage

I love you J.G.!
Happy fifth and cheers to fifty more~


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